Forward
by Trajectory of Simplicity
Summary: She always raced forward and lived with reckless abandon. She chased after her dreams, threw caution to the wind, and ran with all her might to the finish line. SerenaCalem. PokemonXY


She always raced forward and lived with reckless abandon. She chased after her dreams, threw caution to the wind, and ran with all her might to the finish line. She was the girl who shot barbed words at Lysandre (who was _leagues_ stronger than she) and faced down a dozen Team Flare grunts with just herself and a barely formed team of three pokemon.

She wasn't like Shauna who didn't have many dreams in the first place. She wasn't like Trevor who liked research more than play. She wasn't like Tierno who preferred to dance than to battle. She was hard edges and stony determination. Clear in her goals and reckless in achieving them.

She usually left others behind as she plowed forward, reaching for the stars.

Then he moved in to the house next to hers and that's when she realized that the stars she reached for so earnestly were shaped like the back of a raven-haired boy with a smile that could rival the sun.

* * *

She was there when he single-handedly brought down Lysandre. She was there when he courageously faced down the legendary pokemon, Xerneas. She was there when he challenged the Pokemon League and was almost overwhelmed by the incredible battle between him and Diantha.

It was the first time she had seen him struggle so much in a battle; the first time she had seen that look of sheer concentration on his face, like nothing was more important than the situation at hand and the opponent before him.

Calem was down to his last pokemon and so was Diantha. He sent out his Charizard as she sent out her Gardevoir. In a awesome display of power, both pokemon Mega evolved. And the rest of the battle completely blew her away.

At the end of it, Calem stood victorious with his beaten and battered pokemon surrounding him like a halo of glory and Serena was near tears. He never had such a hard time in a battle against her. He was never pushed into a corner like that from her. He never looked so satisfied after a battle against her.

Later, she passed off her tears as those of joy, congratulating him with as much sincerity as she could muster. But she felt the half-hearted way he hugged her. She heard the quickening of breath, the slight stutter in his voice. She saw the way he looked at the now-ex-champion of Kalos, the way his face shone, his smile radiating from his cheeks. She saw everything.

She wasn't stupid, after all.

* * *

After their adventures throughout the region, Serena came home to a mother who embraced her in tears and a town full of pride for their heroes. The five of them rested in luxury for a month before they parted ways once again: Tierno, to compete in dance competitions in other regions; Trevor, to become a full-time assistant to Professor Sycamore; Shauna, to learn breeding and pokemon care from the daycare couple next to Camphrier City.

Calem left to challenge other Pokemon leagues in other regions. It was meant to be a heartfelt goodbye, but Serena just laughed and waved him away. She knew he would be back soon, bearing the title of Champion across the whole world. He boarded the boat to the neighboring Unova region and waved goodbye to his friends until he was a mere dot on the horizon.

As for Serena, she decided to stay. She stayed and battled in tournaments throughout Kalos, making a name for herself as a Trainer. She conquered the Battle Maison in Kiloude City and received every badge from every Gym Leader. She even battled some of the Elite Four in promotional events. She refused to participate in the League, however. That's where he belonged, anyway, she thought.

She wasn't like Calem. She won a lot, but she lost sometimes, too. She had to challenge the Anistar gym twice before she received the badge. She was a good battler, she could even be considered great. But she wasn't a champion. She knew how true that was every time she looked at Diantha and every time she looked at him. _They_ were legends, powerhouses, world-changers.

She could never fit into that.

* * *

He had been in Kalos for three months before she even knew he had returned. They had been separated for four years as he went off to conquer the rest of the world. She watched his progress religiously, always checking the TV, and surfing the Internet for any news about him.

Calem was known throughout the world now. In some regions, he was nicknamed Apollo because of his distinct, beautiful, foreign features and the dazzling way in which he battled. He was so bright, many people said. Bright like the sun.

She was at a dinner party she was invited to, honoring Diantha's newest movie premier. Serena wasn't exactly a social butterfly, but she could hold her own in high-end social events like this one. She had just sat down at a round table full of Ace Trainers and Veterans from past League tournaments when she saw him.

He was in a black tuxedo, his tie impeccably tied around his collar. He entered the room without much pomp or circumstance. In fact, most people didn't even know he arrived. But he made a beeline toward the ex-Champion of Kalos. Diantha beamed and stretched out her hand toward him. And instead of pressing her knuckles to his lips as most people expected him to, he took her hand and pulled her whole body toward him, capturing her lips in a passionate embrace that left Diantha flustered and a little red-cheeked when it was over.

Serena watched this whole thing happen and forced a smile, wondering if anyone in the room was hearing her heart break.

* * *

It was another five months before she saw him again.

Serena was catching up on some much needed sleep when she heard the doorbell ring downstairs. Grumbling in annoyance a little, she got up, tied her hair so she might look somewhat presentable, and headed to the front door. When she pulled it open, there he was, in his old blue zipped sweater and brown cargo jeans. His red cap was sitting lopsided on his head and he grinned at her.

"Hey," he said.

She was rooted at the spot for a long time, completely silent. He had to say her name twice until she finally moved again.

"It's you," she said a little breathlessly.

He chuckled, a sound that was like music to her ears. "It's me."

She wanted to cry a little. Just a little. There was an annoying lump in her throat and a stinging something burning the back of her eyes, but she swiped quickly at her face before inviting him in.

She made him tea and they sat and talked. They never talked of what he had been doing for the past eight months he was in Kalos. Serena didn't think he wanted to tell her and she didn't think she wanted to know in the first place.

They had a pleasant afternoon, just hanging out and catching up. They got through two pots of tea and three plates of the cookies Serena had baked the night before. He stayed until the sun had set beyond the mountains and the stars had begun to dot the sky.

It was as if no time had passed between them. She wanted to challenge him to a battle, but thought better of it. Sometimes, it was just nice to be with a friend. She walked him to the door when they finally decided it was time he left. They were laughing at a joke she had made about the trainers in Kalos when suddenly he faced her, one of her hands in his and his other hand gently cupping her cheek. His lips lightly brushed against her forehead, then her nose and over one cheek before stopping at the corner of her lips. He lingered there for a little bit, his breath tickling her skin. Her lips burned for the touch of his, but she was frozen at the spot.

She was usually the one to do weird and surprising things, to choose a goal and chase after it recklessly. She was usually the one to throw caution to the wind and allow desire and sincerity to guide her actions. But, this time, she thought of dozens of battles lost and defeated, she thought of hours of rigorous training. She thought of nights wondering after his warmth and his breathtaking smile. She thought of the way he looks at Diantha.

She stepped back. "Sorry, Calem."

He just gave her a sad smile and turned away.

"Will I see you again?" she asked.

He turned back, that smile never leaving his face. Her heart ached in her chest at the sight of it. "Of course I will. I'll always come back to you."

She wanted to trust that he meant that. She wanted to hope that he was telling the truth. But she thought of eight unexplainable months and that kiss he shared with Diantha and decided.

"Well, let me know beforehand if you decide to visit. It's not like I'll be waiting." She actually managed to make that sound polite. She was proud of that.

His smile just grew a little sadder before he turned away from her and walked into the street, calling out his Salamence.

He didn't even say good night.

* * *

His name was Jason. He was an Ace-Trainer-turned-Pokemon-Breeder who actually made it to the Pokemon League, only to be defeated at the hands of Diantha herself. Ever since then, he decided battling wasn't for him and ended up learning the basics of breeding where he met Shauna who introduced the two of them.

He had hands that were gentle enough to hold a newly hatched pokemon, but rough enough to manhandle an agitated Nidoqueen. His hair was silky and wavy and slid easily between her fingers. He was handsome and kind and everything she wanted in a guy. He wasn't Calem, but he liked her for who she was and Serena guessed that was the most important thing.

* * *

Jason took her to dinner and the evening was especially nice. She liked him, Serena thought, a little surprised. And when she slipped her hand in his warm grip and saw the endearing blush that adorned his face, she decided that she liked him very much.

When he took her home she kissed him on the cheek and told him to take her out again some time. His grin was like a schoolboy who had won his first battle.

They went on many dates after that.

* * *

A year passed and Serena thought she was finally happy. She had conquered yet another tournament and was going to star in her first pokemon movie alongside Brycen. She had a fan club now, though a small one because she never once challenged the League. Diantha told her that once she stars in a few movies and shows the world how beautiful her pokemon were, her fan club would grow. Serena didn't really care about fan clubs, but she did like the idea of her amazing partners being recognized for the grace and beauty she loved them for.

Jason proposed and Serena said yes. He loved her desperately while she had grown to love him and their relationship was quiet and kind and comfortable.

Serena convinced herself very well that she was happy.

* * *

On a lovely summer's day, Serena had gone out on a walk around Vaniville with her beloved Delphox. When they came home, it was barely past noon and on her doorstep was a painfully familiar figure that shot daggers into her chest.

He heard her approach and he turned around, a bright smile on his face. "Hey there," he said. "Been a while, hasn't it?"

Her heartbeat escalated in her chest.

She forced a smile and said, "Yeah. It has."

The summer sun that had been, moments ago, warm and comfortable, was now shining oppressively upon her head. She wanted to step into the shade of her porch, but that would bring her closer to the black-haired, smiling man before her and Serena could not— _would not_ —let that happen.

His eyes flicked down to the shining gem resting upon her left hand and his gaze turned a little bitter. "So, you're engaged."

Serena instinctively moved to hide her hand behind her, feeling a slight sense of shame, but stopped herself. What was there for her to be ashamed of? She nodded in affirmation. "Yup," she said cheerfully, as if she hadn't had her heart broken in two. As if she wasn't settling for what was good and kind and comfortable. "We're getting married in two months." She paused and the resulting silence screamed so loud between them that she thought her eardrums would burst. She continued, wanting to fill the unbearable awkwardness between them with sound; pointless chatter that distracted from the fact that her whole world was tilting upon its axis with the simple appearance of a shadow of her past. "We actually wanted to get married sooner, but he has his Breeder training to think about and—"

"So he's a Breeder, huh?" Calem interrupted and Serena's breath caught in her throat. His voice betrayed almost no emotion, except a slight curiosity, but she knew him. She knew that he was a peerless actor. She knew that he hid his emotions behind sparkling smiles and dazzling light so that none can know what lies in his heart.

"Yeah," she replied, trying desperately to remain calm. "He's a Breeder."

He let out a chuckle and the sounds made her heart scream. "Man, I always thought you'd fall for some Ace Trainer or a Gym Leader. You always loved to battle."

She didn't know why, but that was the last straw. A million emotions came crashing through the gates of her self-control as she remembered nights under the stars that reminded her of his eyes, hundreds of lost battles and broken hearts, five unaccounted years that stretched miles between them, and warm laughter within the smell of cookies and home and impossible dreams that seemed only a breath away. That familiar chuckle. That back-handed comment. That gaze that spoke of a thousand things that Serena dared to hope…dared to _cling to_ …

Her fists clenched as she recalled her Delphox back into her pokeball. She grit her teeth and her voice trembled against the onslaught of anger, sorrow, and the toxic pain of holding onto something barely alive.

"No, not an Ace Trainer, you idiot." She didn't want to talk, but years of a dying friendship forced her heart to swing open and she couldn't stop herself. Tears slid unbidden down her cheeks. "I fell for a Champion."

She forced her eyes down, away from him so she didn't have to see his expression. She wanted to run away. Not from embarrassment. Not from shame. She was past that. She just wanted this crushing feeling in her chest to go away. The feeling that no matter how much time or care or love she gave, her dreams will never come true.

His voice was quiet, calm. Like a concrete wall against a raging storm. "I love you."

Something in her broke. Whether it was her heart or her self-restraint or her soul, she didn't know. Maybe it was a combination of the three. Maybe it was all of it, all of _her,_ all at once.

She snapped her head up and punched him right in the face with everything she had. He wheeled back, collapsing against her door. He clutched his bleeding cheek as he stared at her in what looked like wonder and shock.

She trembled; so angry, so hurt, so pained that she thought she might burst. She hated him. She hated him! She _hated_ him!

She loved him.

" _How could you say that?"_ she screamed at him. She didn't care if the neighbors heard. She didn't care if the whole world knew. " _After all this time? After you led my heart around on a string, dragging me through the mud, making me pine after you for years?"_ She had never been so emotional. She had never been so furious or so deeply in love. " _I was right here! I was always right here, waiting for you, and you knew it. But you chose her instead."_

Her voice broke then, but she couldn't stop now. She couldn't stop until she said everything she needed to say. "You chose her because you loved her but she left you. And now you're _lying_ to yourself _and_ to me because you don't love me. You never loved me. And you never will. And you're _pathetic_ for saying that you do."

She pulled him off her door and as she did, tried not to gag. She threw him off her porch and marched into her home to slam the door behind her, but not before turning around once more to scream—

Time stopped.

…

When he pulled away, she was speechless. His hand was upon the small of her back, the other caressing her cheek carefully and deliberately. Her body molded into his perfectly, naturally and it felt so good to be held like this; like dreams whispered within blanket sheets and laughter under the stars.

She could not move from the warmth upon her lips and the heat from his body. She could only stand there and be amazed as Calem—strong, invincible, legendary Calem—cried softly against her cheek. He whispered to her like a child to his mother, like a broken heart to its lover. His voice was trembling and wet and full of longing such that she had never heard from his voice before.

"You're wrong. You're _wrong_. It was always you," he said over and over again.

What could she say? What could she do?

She was the one who raced forward and lived with reckless abandon. She was the one who chased her dreams, threw caution to the wind, and ran with all her might to the finish line. She was the one who shot barbed words at Lysandre even though he was completely capable of destroying her on the spot. She was the one who faced down a dozen Team Flare grunts with just herself and a barely formed team of three pokemon.

She didn't think. She refused to.

When she leaned forward, he was there and he didn't let go.

* * *

She broke Jason's heart. That was the worst part. She loved him, in that quiet and comfortable way that he taught her and seeing his face when she ended it felt like a stab through the heart.

He loved her in the way she loved Calem. She was sorry for hurting him, but not sorry for preventing a lie. Jason was a good man and an even better friend; she believed with all her heart that he would be okay.

* * *

They did not marry.

There were still five years of separation and ten years of repressed emotion. She did not trust him and he could not be truthful, for his wounds—whatever they were—were still raw.

They often traveled to the Pokemon Village, where Calem had stumbled upon after trying to find Wulfric and where Serena had discovered after exploring the forest of Route 20. It became a haven for the two of them, a place of serenity, where Serena could lay calmly under the stars and listen to Calem's stories of breathtaking battles she could not be there for and legendary Trainers living, alone and silent, atop a mountain.

Sometimes, they talked of Diantha and Jason, and when they did it was not bitter, for the scent of the Village and the sounds of content pokemon soothed them. Serena was not angry—she couldn't be—not at him, but she was cautious, for she knew that her heart was more fragile than ever now that she had placed it so carelessly into his hands.

But he was careful and he was slow. And in halting sentences, he quietly revealed to her the months—years—he spent with Diantha, the reasons why he chose a movie star and not his best friend, the emptiness he felt, and the resulting need to get out and away. He did this until Serena finally understood that he wasn't lying when he said it _had_ always been her. She was the one he loved and he was a coward who could face impossible odds but not himself, and especially not her. His tale was finished and Serena lay there in silence for what seemed like an eternity.

She didn't know what to think for a very long time.

* * *

Serena did not like the stage as much as she thought she would and neither did her pokemon. Their movies were popular and successful and Serena's fan club _did_ grow, but they stopped after the fifth and Serena did not miss the collective sigh of relief her pokemon gave when she told them her plans.

Immediately, Serena started battling again, finally knowing that movie stardom was not the limelight she wished for. But the dream she had when she was a child, just starting on her journey, an energetic Fennekin by her side, seemed so far away, lost in the arms of a man who spent five years running away from her, a man who she didn't know if she could trust.

She lost every subsequent exhibition match she was called on to battle until, in frustration, she entered a tournament, hoping to regain some of her lost confidence. She lost spectacularly. She didn't even reach the second round, defeated by an amateur Bug Catcher with a particularly nasty Venomoth and an even nastier attitude.

Her Delphox's eyes communicated sadness and deep concern as her opponent's Venomoth swooped circles in the air, victorious, as confetti popped on the other side of the battlefield. _We could have won this,_ her beloved partner seemed to scream at her. _You're better than this._ Serena held back a sob and recalled her dearest friend back into her pokeball.

That night, Serena didn't sleep a wink. Serena was not a thinker. She liked moving forward, adapting to different situations or at the very least plowing through them until they were forgotten memories far behind her. But now…now that her dreams are lying crumbled at her feet and a harsh losing streak is following her wherever she went, how in the world was she supposed to know which way was forward?

* * *

Calem, Shauna, Tierno, and Trevor each tried knocking on her door, but Serena ignored them.

* * *

It was the fifth day after her spectacular loss and Serena woke up to the sound of her front door being blown from its hinges. Years of journeying and battling gave her instincts to match and her Delphox was already out, crouched, and ready to fight by the time Serena had jumped out of her bed.

She was immediately frozen when he burst into her room with his Greninja glaring intimidatingly behind him. Without saying a word, he grabbed her hand. Despite her protests, Calem dragged her out of her home and onto his Talonflame. They flew to a secluded clearing in Route 1 where Calem promptly dropped her onto the ground.

"Battle me," he said before she even was able to stand.

Serena glared daggers at him as she dusted herself off. "Fuck you," she spat.

But his Greninja was already out and ready for action. Calem sneered back, "What, afraid you'll lose again?"

That was it. Serena was done. "How dare you!" she screamed, anger bubbling in her chest, in her stomach, throughout her whole being. She could never be calm around this man, could she? "You're the reason I'm losing anyway! It's all your fault, you stupid coward!"

"If it's my fault, then let me fix it!"

"So, what, I should just _trust_ you after all these years? After everything you put me through?"

"If you're that angry, then use it in battle. Fight me, and win. Or do you want to lose forever?"

Serena let out a shriek of rage before releasing her Flygon, who roared right alongside her.

Calem—irritating, cowardly, stupid, _beautiful_ Calem—grinned infuriatingly at her and Serena wanted to claw it off. "Atta girl," he mumbled. As per usual, she made the first move.

She neither won nor lost because at the end of it all, it was him, her, her Flygon, and his Greninja, on the grassy arena, laughter filling the skies making Serena wonder why she had ever been so depressed before. Not when there were battles to be fought, memories to be made, and her beloved pokemon to care for. Because looking at him now—the tamer of Xerneas, the legendary Apollo—she realized that it was never dreams or stars or legends or even Calem she was chasing. What she had been reaching for all this time was right here in front of her, in the form of laughter, green grass, blue skies, and joyful pokemon at her side. It had never been about winning. It had never been about becoming a legend.

When their giggles died down, he took her face in his hands and pressed his lips against hers. When he pulled away, the expression on his face made her chest throb with a faint reminder of what used to be (of the shining girl just starting off on her journey with an energetic Fennekin by her side).

In her heart, she wondered if it was okay to believe in him again.

* * *

Calem stayed. He was by her side everyday afterward until his face in the morning was as normal to her as the grass being green and the sky being blue; constant, unchanging, everlasting.

* * *

Eventually, she challenged the League. She did not win; lost to the Champion, himself.

But at this point, she didn't mind. Because in her heart, she _did_ win. She won when Calem's arms opened to receive hers, with that brilliant smile upon his face, eyes as bright and beautiful as the stars.

And maybe it took ten years, but he was finally here, _hers_. And she, his.

* * *

They walked hand in hand, carrying a child with eyes like his and a spirit like hers and the only direction left to move was forward.

* * *

 _A/N: Thank you for reading this ridiculous story. This is possibly my first and last hurrah into this fandom; I have no confidence in writing for a franchise that was so pivotal to my childhood. But I hope you enjoyed this anyway and that you continue to have a good day filled with laughter and great companionship._


End file.
